Habanerogal

Archive for the ‘sex 101’ Category

Most of the folks on Facebook are getting annoyed with all of the suggestions that the robots or drones over there are making. People that you might know because 14 of your friends know them, people who don’t have enough friends so I can help them find some? Since when did Facebook think I should be some sort of internet matchmaker. Haven’t they heard, Eharmony is doing a “fine job” of that without my suggestions.
What really gets to me is when they actually have the audacity to suggest to me that I reconnect with my husband. I hope they aren’t watching me on the webcam that we have here on the computer desk in my bedroom. Perhaps we aren’t getting it on quite enough. They would know THEY are watching.

Update: Now that I am mocking Faceboook about my sexual exploits they are putting ads for Tantric Sex workshops on my sidebar. Intersting and creepy all at once. Do you suppose Sting and Trudy will be the instructors. Hope there is no demo or hands on approach…

Since one of my only guilty pleasures in life is TV now that I don’t have the cancer sticks to fall back on I need a distraction. Lets face it if I drank beer to dull that non-smoky feeling I’d be a REALLY chubby drunk all the time. (not just on Twitter)

Since this is just a fantasty exercise let us begin with my first fave TV guy which is Anthony Bourdain. He is completely funny and irreverent, age appropriate and also one of my smoking quitting heros. His No Reservations twitter people even retweeted my thanks out there to the universe.

Hubby #2 Would be Don Draper also known by his real life name of Jon Hamm but alas character is a smoker so he’s out. Cheaters never get to be in my fantasy.
From the AMC gang as well would be another yummy dad named Bryan Cranston . My reasons from above still apply. Age appropriate check, irreverent check bit of a bad boy ( well his character does make drugs and lets people who are in his path just die) I say he’s bonafide.
Hubby #3 After food and drugs comes brave and dangerous so in that category I will have to go with Mr Don Eppes of Numb3rs
He is aloof and sexy in a non needy way unlike another CBS man of the night known as Jake Weber of Medium. His character is a bit too doormat for me.

In short I need a fantasy guy who isn’t my son’s age (ew cougar breath) and a bit smart and edgy. I will continue my quest in weeks to come but do tell me who is your fantasy TV hubby and why.

Was reminded today since it is Canada Day of a trip that took us through Utah on the way to California. That story is a whole other post where I will tell you about leaving the country without even a toothbrush.
Anywho… we needed to stop to get an oilchange, since the Viking is a fanatic about car upkeep. The map told me that the next town with a dot bigger than an atom was called Beaver. Could this be true? I have a thing for taking photos of signs and the ones that say “Entering (insert name) and posing there. We got to the outskirts of this average size rural town and as I scout the horizon for any type of “Entering Beaver” sign I am heartbroken because they went for the less effective Welcome to Beaver.
This Canadian girl’s dream was crushed. On a brighter note, I did get a shot of the sign that bears my name going through Montana.

*today I asked my girl bits some important questions on http://wipingupsnot.com/2009/03/02/hand-your-vagina-the-keyboard-i-have-some-questions-for-her/
*got a gym membership a month ago went once…time to step up
*started a spring purge so many boxes…need to simplify and recycle more often
*gave the heave ho to Internet Explorer and moved over to Opera, much easier and visually blows IE outta the water.
*lost 5 minutes of my life that I will never get back looking at the sniveling man who is the latest Bachelor, seriously who would want that creap as his sloppy seconds?
*save for a rainy day it could come to a home near you.
*live love and remember to put hotsauce on everything !


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